I have been running for two reasons... one, I want to be more healthy, and two, I want to be much thinner. Much, Much thinner. Dieting did not work, so I figured I need to get my ass moving. However, my running has not been working either, much to my dismay and shock.
I went to the doctor yesterday because I know people who walk around the block once or twice and lose 10 pounds, so I figured I should talk to my physician. Secretly, I hoped I would get on and see some movement. Something. Nope. Its been 6 weeks since I weighed myself last, and the scale had not budged one single pound. The only change I know created by running is that my legs are harder and leaner and I am no longer one of the most constipated people on the planet. But any sveldt, slim image staring back at me from any reflections? Nope. Nada. Still the ever pudgy me. Depressing.
My doctor did order blood drawn for possible thyroid problems, but his other explanation upon me asking, "Doesn't this shock you... with me running 3 miles a day," was quite disheartening. He retorted, "Not for a woman. Its just plain impossible for many women to lose weight."
Sigh. Heavy, long, large, sigh.
2 comments:
Well, this was a lovely post, well-written and directly to the point, as we should all expect from the brilliant K. And of course I am a fan of writing from the hip, especially one as smooth and curvy as K's.
HOWEVER...
I must say as one who sees this "pudgy" body every single day, that K is full of shit. I mean, have you SEEN her profile picture? And that's just a fucking lowsy web camera pic. K McKiernan is a hot one.
I am calling for more from-the-hip writing from the author...only this time about her increasingly raised standards for her own appearance. She is not pudgy, she is gorgeous. But she has her own ideal...the impossible ideal. Not to say that there is a true, tangible, unreachable goal...it's just that for K, perfection is an ever-moving target...as she inches closer to it, her idea of it moves further away still.
That is what I want your next post to be, K.
Love...
K, he point is you are getting exercise, and that's most important for your health. (~applause~) Maybe you're running too much and not giving your muscles a rest? How about a gym where you can switch off exercises? I took personal training classes for fun, so I hope I don't sound overbearing.
The "thinner" myth comes from buying into the Mad Ave bullshit. I worked out for seven years. OK, I did the size 2 thing for a while, but was living on so few calories that I would wake up in the middle of the night and eat in my sleep. Hardly physically OR emotionally healthy.
Try dividing weightlifting with cardio. Cardio doesn't build muscles; lifting weights makes you lean. And, no, women can't become overly muscular (whatever that means...) unless they use steroids. Weights are great for learning focus and concentrating on the muscles you use. Lifting is a lot like Yoga.
This is the best weight training book. DeLavier shows exercises to target the body and the muscles worked. I used to enjoy closing my eyes and meditating on the muscle.
You won't necessarily lose weight because muscle weighs more than fat, but you'll have more lean body weight. Cardio is for the heart muscle and burning fat, weights are for all the other muscles. Also, you can eat more because muscle burns fatty tissue and needs more calories to maintain.
It's emotionally difficult, but please don't buy into this culture and its "thinner" obsession. The fact that you have more muscle on your leg may mean more muscle weight, which means you've become leaner. Scales and BMI do not measure a healthy body. And "ideal weight" is an oxymoron.
I think most women buy into that "impossible ideal," J. BTW, my husband has the same attitude as you. I refuse to judge my worth by the size of my clothes. I'll get back to the gym as my life settles into a routine, but only for health.
I can't stand seeing intelligent women depressed with body dysmorphia. We all suffer from this psychological plague and losing weight is only important when one's health is at stake.
I believe a woman who is comfortable and happy is at her ideal weight; chasing some random standard of body type is a waste of time and joy.
Oh, whoops, another overly long post.
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